Be – my 2019 OLW
It has served me well. I held it close. It helped me reflect on days in the simplest of ways. A few months, I even kept track of my be reflections.
But when I think back on the year, November 7 was the day that be made it’s presence known.
I got the text I knew was coming. I left school. I stopped at home. I packed a bag not knowing exactly when I would be back home. Calming conversation with myself filled the two hour ride – “It’s OK if I don’t make it. If I am meant to be there, I will be there. If not, oh well. It’s all good.” Tears would well up. At times I would push them back in. At times I would let them fall. I drove on.
I walked in the door and I could see my sister in the back family room. I gave her a questioning look. She smiled and nodded and I knew I had made it. The house was filled with family. We surrounded my Dad with unending love and laughter for six and half hours. We raised a few shots of Mr. Boston Ginger Brandy in honor of him, in honor of us, his family, his pride and joy. When the passing was imminent, shortly after 6:00 pm, my Dad’s family encircled him. I sat on his left, close to his head. Close to his heart. I held his hand and felt the pulse fade.
When I think back to that day, I am filled with gratitude. It was a day filled with love, family, and many blessings.
I had made it.
I was there.
be there
Your words made me teary. I remember thinking of you and your family so much that day and the days that followed. I’m so glad you got to be there.
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Tears. You were meant to be there for sure.
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I’m so glad you were there. I was with my mom when she passed, and I know that feeling of being surrounded by family and love as you experience the hardest moment of your life. You are so present. I can’t wait to see what your OLW for 2020 will be.
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What a powerful piece, beautifully crafted and filled with so much emotion. It is such a privilege to be there for someone you love’s last moments but also so hard to say goodbye. I am sure your dad felt surrounded by love and what a beautiful way to send him off to that better place we all hope to find. Your word was the perfect one.
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I’m emotional after reading this post, Dawn. You were meant to BE there in your father’s final moments. How precious and tender they were.
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What a beautiful post…to the very last be.
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